bensaret

Rock the vote!

2008-11-04T14:54:33Z

4100 miles later...

2008-08-13T02:56:21Z

Aaaaand I made it! One hell of a drive, but I love traveling so it's all good. Left San Diego on the 30th and made it out here to Fairfax, VA, on the east coast on the 9th (thank God they let me move in early).

First, some photographs:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/27713140@N07/sets/72157606694848604/
Follow the link to see snapshots of the adventure (don't worry, I spared you most of the scenery I shot).

So here's how it went down:
DAYS 1-3
Left San Diego on Wed, July 30th (and of course forgot to make a final stop at the comic store on the way out of town, big mistake) and headed up to L.A. Stopped to see my buds Lia, Jessica and Steven, and even managed to make one last delivery for Look Effects to Universal Studios (so next time you watch an episode of "Life", you've got me to thank!).
(BTW, thanks for the loan of your camera Jess, I'll mail it back to you as soon as you get around to sending me your addy )
Next morning it was off to Flagstaff. Stopped at the Grand Canyon to catch an awesome sunset before heading off to a cheap motel. And after some sleep I dropped by my no.1 vegan Madelyn before continuing on to Colorado Springs. I did make a short stop at Four Corners Monument (sorry for the snapshot, lol) where weirdly enough I saw John Locke from "Lost" -- guess he got tired of the tropics. And no, I didn't grab a photo -- the man was probably on vacation.

DAYS 4-6
After staying in a terribly overpriced roach motel for the night, I made a stop at the Air Force Academy. This was an interesting experience as I hadn't been there in 16 years, since I actually attended as a cadet. Smells, sounds, seeing my old dorm, watching the 4th years (freshmen) march to lunch, even the low oxygen level... Strange experiencing it again after so long.
Done with the reminiscing, I made a quick stop at the Garden of the Gods and then headed off. After a looong day on the road I made it to York, Nebraska, where I own some corn fields. Spent the night at what had to be the cleanest and most comfortable cheap-motel I've ever stayed at, then spent the majority of the day checking out my property, soy bean crops, corn (sorry folks, couldn't find a place that sold corncob pipes as souveniers), and other exciting things you find on a farm. Continued on from York to Lincoln to visit my grandmother's resting site and then made like a lightning bolt south -- I was determined for some reason not to stop in Kansas for any reason whatsoever and somehow pulled it off. Found the first motel in Oklahoma I could stop at and crashed for the night.
Next day it was onward to Dallas! Made it halfway through the day and spent the rest of the night with my no.1 bud James watching episodes of The Office on DVD .

DAYS 7-10
I stayed in DFW for a couple days, hung out with my top friend Angee most of the time. Caught the 3rd Mummy movie (I miss the previous actress in the franchise !) and of course saw The Dark Knight again . Watched some crappy direct-to-DVD flix (I figured Starship Troopers 3 would suck but not THAT much! ... ok, maybe I did, hahaha...), relaxed and let my car take a break, because the next day I was off again!
Took a straight drive north-east, not a lot of sightseeing this half of the trip. Stopped in Knoxville for a night's sleep, and the next day kept pressing forward and made it halfway through Virginia before calling it a night.

DAY 11!
Headed out of the motel, drove a couple of hours through the mountains, and TA-DA! MADE IT! And now here I am in my new and fairly empty apartment -- got something to sleep on, something to put my computer on, something for my houseplants to stand on (since I wasn't going to leave Charlie or Sticker on the ground at the mercy of squirrels; FYI, plants are not the most talkative travel companions), and thus ended my great roadtrip!

So now I'm here, started my new job yesterday and everything. Let's hope the drive out here was worth it -- I'm giving this Customer Support gig a few months trial. We'll see if Virginia sells me by the end of the year, if not I can just pack everything up and head back to sunny San Diego. Wish me luck!

Exploring for SCIENCE!

2008-07-24T21:31:38Z

Yeah, I decided to take a test and see how steampunky I am ;) --

Your result for The Steampunk Style Test...

The Explorer

39% Elegant, 41% Technological, 20% Historical, 60% Adventurous and 34% Playful!

You are the Explorer, the embodiment of steampunk’s adventuring spirit. For you, clothing should be rugged and reliable, and just as functional as it is attractive. You probably prefer khaki or leather, and your accessories are as likely to include weapons as technological gizmos. You probably wear boots and gloves, and maybe a pith helmet. Most of what you wear is functional, and if you happen to wear goggles people had better believe that you use them. In addition to Victorian exploration gear, your outfit probably includes little knickknacks from your various travels. Above all, you are a charming blend of rugged Victorian daring and exotic curiosity.

Try our other Steampunk test here.

Take The Steampunk Style Test at HelloQuizzy

No CC 4 m3

2008-07-22T17:29:03Z

Since I'm moving over this and next week, I won't have time to Comic Con this year, I'm afraid :(. My apologies to my friends coming out to San Diego, but if anyone wants to grab dinner or something just ring me and I'll try to make my way downtown ^_^;;;.

Best. Movie. Of the summer.

2008-07-18T10:46:57Z

The Dark Knight is, simply put, a great movie that just happens to have a superhero in it. There are some very powerful scenes in it, some amazing performances, and was without a doubt worth every minute in line. Yes it's long, but that's just how I like my stories. Go see it.

Eastward bound

2008-07-16T18:59:18Z

Well, after months of job hunting for something semi-decent that could use my skillsets, I've got a position lined up at EA Mythic working on customer support for Warhammer Online. Not the primary position I was hoping for -- there's a position at a northern Cali company I've been interviewing for for a while, but they decided to put it on hold for now -- but it's with a strong, established company and might lead to some better things down the line. Biggest downside is that I'll have to leave San Diego to take it, where all my friends and family are and the weather is always perfect and beach-ready. But like I said: it's work and it's with a good gaming company.
So wish me luck, I head cross-country at the end of the month, and if anyone is out there near Washington DC drop me a note and I'll say hi .
And in something more upbeat: Batman in IMAX this Thursday at midnight! The perfect cap to a summer of many good fliks . There's been a lot of plusses this year and very few minuses, so I have been properly entertained and will allow the world to keep on spinning for a little longer.
Oh yeah, and I finally got around to working on some new art after having a dead muse for neary two years. Currently I'm working on this little number:

A collection of my top MMO characters, I've colored it and am now shading it, looooong process. Got another couple of pieces I'm still drawing but since I'm packing they'll probably be put on hold till I relocate and reassemble my drafting table.
Anyway, lots to do today so I better get crackin'.

90 percent

2008-06-01T23:18:11Z

So how does it happen, great love? Nobody knows... but what I can tell you is that it happens in the blink of an eye. One moment you're enjoying your life, and the next you're wondering how you ever lived without them.

http://formula119.com/worktemp/whenwedance.wma

Basic Principles - no woman wakes up saying "God, I hope I don't get swept off my feet today!" Now, she might say "This is a really bad time for me," or something like "I just need some space," or my personal favorite "I'm really into my career right now." You believe that? Neither does she. You know why? 'Cause she's lying to you, that's why. You understand me? Lying! It's not a bad time for her. She doesn't need any space. And she may be into her career, but what she's really saying is "Uh, get away from me now," or possibly "Try harder, stupid," but which one is it? 60% of all human communication is nonverbal, body language; 30% is your tone, so that means 90% of what you're saying ain't coming out of your mouth. Of course she's going to lie to you! She's a nice person! She doesn't want to hurt your feelings! What else she going to say? She doesn't even know you... yet. Luckily, the fact is that just like the rest of us, even a beautiful woman doesn't know what she wants until she sees it. Basic Principles - no matter what, no matter when, no matter who... any man has a chance to sweep any woman off her feet; he just needs the right broom.

Throw me the whip!

2008-05-22T08:13:46Z

So I've held a couple of parties at my place lately -- just had an Indiana Jones movie night at my apartment (figured it would make a good primer since Indy 4 comes out this week), invited my neighbors and friends, we had a blast (and now I'm stuffed with pizza, soda and chips, ugh XD). I should've started doing this thing more often, having a bunch of people over is a hoot and the folks I live around are really cool. Definitely gonna do this more often :D.

The Big Sleep

2008-05-08T10:52:39Z

Surreal experience: dreaming so heavily last night that I didn't recognize my own apartment when I woke up in the morning. Man, was that a confusing few minutes while I switched from dream-memory back to real-life .
It was some darn-good sleep though, lemme tells ya.

Boom! Action theater!

2008-05-08T02:44:48Z

Rant, hooooooooo!

So someone set off a small pipebomb in front of city hall here in San Diego Saturday night at 1:30am and broke some glass on a door. First thing that pops out of the mouth of the local news is "possible terrorism". Riiiiiiiiight. A mighty blow was struck by Al Quaeda by breaking some glass in the middle of the night when no one was anywhere near the building. Anyone with a modicrum of common sense can guess it was probably some kids playing a dumb prank, but of course the news has to go and sound all dramatic by pretending a jihad has been declared on our fair city.
Seriously, what the hell is with people being so blindly reactionary? Especially people in a position of supposed responsibility, like media (jokes aside, they should have responsibility and personal accountability). Has the public IQ dropped a hundred points over the last few decades? Do people just desperately need to feel like they're in an action movie because their lives are otherwise bleak, dull and meaningless?
This is really just one example of the whole thing. The latest Rev. Wright nonsense we've been seeing lately is another -- the man is nothing more than just another biggot spreading hate and racism, yet the news (and sadly many paritioners) takes him seriously enough to give his words air time. The public need for scandal and drama gives him fuel and screws up our capacity to move forward once again.
And these are just a couple of examples. You can watch any episode of the Daily Show, laugh when they point out general ignorance and stupidity, and deep inside feel sick because no matter how much you are entertained you know what a mess things really are.

I think lately I've been getting more and more annoyed with the general regression towards ignorance -- I sometimes wonder if we're not returning to the Dark Ages, back to the era of religious superstition and a fear of the unknown, of placation to those who are in power because it's less responsibility for ourselves. Are human beings really scared of becoming enlightened, better creatures? We certainly have the capacity for becoming great, but the tiniest of things can hurt our feelings, make us afraid, whatever, and suddenly we have an excuse to go diving for our holes and hide out till we think our shadow isn't out there waiting to scare us for another six weeks.
Then again, maybe I'm giving people too much credit. Maybe focusing on irrelevant matters and minutia is all the general public really wants (or at least all they can mentally handle). Maybe people actually give a damn if Obama wears a flag pin -- brings to mind post 9/11, when people had the gall to point fingers and call people without flags on their SUVs unpatriotic. Somehow these accusatory fools got their words heard, somehow they were taken seriously, and somehow the endless cycle of their ignorance never seems to end. And it's not because no one is willing to step up and say "Grow up, people!" It's simply because the majority of people out there just don't care.

Girl power!

2008-03-25T09:16:39Z

The coolest thing in the history of forever.

Try not to blink. And ignore the apparent lack of physics when at all possible.

Gaia goodness

2008-03-20T15:51:20Z

Who has the power NOW, baby???

2008-03-12T22:07:11Z

I want!

http://www.thinkgeek.com/computing/accessories/9116/

(and it's even available in pocket-size too :D -- http://www.thinkgeek.com/geektoys/japanfan/9806/ )

New Wall-E trailer!

2008-03-12T09:19:54Z

Ah, this latest one looks cute =D! Go check it out -- http://www.apple.com/trailers/disney/walle/hd/
I said go! NOW!

Someone cast Resurrect, fast!

2008-03-05T18:59:36Z

Just found out, Gary Gygax -- creator of Dungeons & Dragons -- passed away yesterday. I played some D&D when I was younger, and the games always provided some great inspiration for fantasy writing later in life. Not to mention were it not for him there would probably be no EverQuest, World of Warcraft, or any other fantasy based game or even MMO (Massively Multiplayer Online game) -- at least, nothing as richly developed and well planned out. Hopefully he's enjoying his new role as a Petitioner in the Outer Planes right now (that's some nerd humor right there, kids).

And now, something stolen from Penny Arcade:

I'm pretty sure that he'd find this quite amusing ^_^.

Oscar central!

2008-02-24T15:05:15Z

This is the view from the Look Effects office down at the Kodak Theater on Hollywood and Highland. Check it out, catch the red carpet action tonight in realtime :)

http://www.lookfx.com/webcam/cam.html

username: lookfx1
password: 123456

Edit: so yeah, it's kinda rainy right now, you're probably not going to have as good a view as I'd hoped XD

Now you're cookin' with Crisco!

2008-02-24T07:12:26Z

Normally when it's breakfast time I'll just pour a bowl of cereal and be done with it -- quick, easy, and relatively simple to avoid burning down my kitchen. After visiting my grandmother though I've been putting some more effort over the stove: during this last week I've made crepes, a cheese omelete, eggies in a basket, pancakes, and grits (ok, so grits technically count as cereal... It's not exactly a bowl of cornflakes either). Not sure what I'll cook up tomorrow morning, but I've got some cookbooks with plenty of choices in them: maybe french toast?
Figured I'll also try to play with some of these dessert recipes my grandmother supplied me with while I was in Israel. I can either try to make some strudel, sachertorte, or maybe her apple pie recipe which I've made before (I actually have a hankerin' to make her plum cake recipe, but plums are out of season right now).

Fun behind the oven, aw yeah!

The Israeli experience, part 2

2008-02-19T20:43:22Z

As previously mentioned, Jason's back in the land of apple pie and baseball (no, not Japan). The trip was really fantastic and ended way too soon -- one week is just not enough time to be in Israel.

Before we continue, some tidbits for you:
1.) When I'm in a foreign country I apparently pick up the local accent, even when I speak in English. Takes me till I get back in my apartment to get rid of it.
2.) Looking for a hot date? Look no further than Israeli airport security -- about 90% of the security staff there are, and I kid you not, extremely cute (and sometimes even model-worthy) young ladies. Meanwhile, the remaining 10% of the staff are guys that look like Jason Statham with a tan. Odds are 100% of them can kick your ass in 2 seconds flat -- for those of you not in the know, military service (including occassional frontline combat duty) is mandatory for both sexes when you turn 18.
3.) You get really passe' about terrorism out there. My mom had to take a train from Tel Aviv to Haifa but was forced to take a taxi the second half of the way when a bombing down the tracks cut railway service short for the rest of the day. When I talked to her on the phone about it our main concern was if she'd make it in time for lunch. Eh, bombings, whatcha gonna do...

Ok, so, Thursday on: hung out with my cousin Smadar in the morning along with some of her crazy yet very cool techno-DJ yoga-performing friends. And when the evening came the family headed down to the hotel, got lost in what has to be the most god-awful, convoluted underground parking structure in the history of humankind (despite the fanciness of everything above-ground), and when we finally found our through the labrynth headed on up. The wedding was awesome: 350 people, lots of food, pretty decent dance music selection. Lots of fun, plus did I mention my cousin got married to a really great guy? I hope they have a lot of happiness together down the road .

Friday... Erg, coming to the last few days of my trip. Went on a hike through the woods with part of the family, then dinner in the evening with the whole clan. FYI, my cousins have the CUTEST children on the face of this planet -- it's like nothing that comes from my uncles' gene pool is anything less than three shades of gorgeous, and then the next generation somehow manages to up the ante'.

Saturday we had lunch with the family (yes, again) and then I drove some of us to Tel Aviv to visit my one cousin (Na'ama) that wasn't able to come down the wedding -- nice place they have out in Tel Aviv, plus Na'ama's husband plays the piano and was serenading us while we all sat around and chatted.

And of course we come to Sunday, last day in town. One week... Sigh. Mom and Grandma and I went to have lunch in the kibbutz dining hall, then I spent the rest of the afternoon with Smadar after I'd packed. And then it was off to the train station to head up to Ben Gurion Airport.
And now I'm back in the US of A, fighting off jetlag (been awake since 11pm last night, ugh) and relaxing a little before jumping back into the grind.

Honestly, if it wasn't for the fact my language skills suck and I'm still technically eligible for military service for another couple of years, I'd seriously consider relocating to Israel for a little while. Not forever, but maybe for a year or two -- the place really fits me nicely. But alas, I think I'm pretty used to the style of living you get in the States that you just don't get over there. In their defense though, everyone's got a pretty spankin' fast internet connection and there are plenty of clubs to hang out in (techno is apparently the big thing out there-- and fyi, they call clubs "discoteques" ); hmmm, come to think of it, I should have probably ordered some absynthe while I was there...

I'll upload the pics to my MySpace tonight when I'm less woozy from jetlag, but in the meantime I shall leave you with a couple of gems: views from the Carmel Mountains next to Haifa (which is close to wear I stayed).

And from the Bahai Gardens a little deeper in town and looking down:

Meanwhile, in Israel...

2008-02-14T09:48:38Z

Alrighty, so it's been about four days out here in the great state of Israel so far -- incidentally, Happy Valentines Day to you all (and for the more bitterly-inclined of you out there, have a Happy Half-Off Chocolate Day tomorrow).

Flight out was alright, though a.) Delta has some fucking uncomfortable seats, and b.) I can't sleep sitting upright anyway. From San Diego to Atlanta I got to sit next to a fairly neurotic Chinese engineer who didn't seem to be very comfortable flying, didn't seem to understand the concept of personal space (your elbows stay on YOUR side of the arm rest, pal), and had his pants hiked up too far for anyone's good. From Atlanta to Tel Aviv I sat next to an old Russian couple that, while sweet and friendly, were so rotund that they couldn't fit the seatbelt around their waist (no, I'm serious), and as forementioned I can't sleep sitting upright if my life depended on it. On the plus side though I was treated to a beautiful sunset and a beautiful sunrise in relatively close time to each other due to our flying eastward, and the stars at night are indeed big, bright and amazing when flying at 37000 ft.

So I arrived on Sunday night, was picked up by my cousin and her fiance, and proceeded to sleep for most of the drive home (and then most of the night thereafter until jetlag woke me up at 3am). Monday was nice since mom came into town (now there's a bad flight story -- her plane broke down and instead of stopping in Paris she ended up being stuck in New York for 12 hours) and I got to reaquaint myself with the town -- I hadn't been here in four years. It was weird, I've done so much driving and traveling since then that I didn't feel like I was in Israel at all but rather just another part of Cali. Saw the family, had food, visited people I knew out here, and then crashed at 8pm.

Tuesday was cool, I drove mom and grandmom to Jerusalem to visit people (2 hour drive), then to Tel Aviv to visit people (hour and a half drive), then back home to the kibbutz near Haifa (again, hour and a half). Lemme just say this: I love this country, but MAN is it DIRTY. Seriously, like every wall out here is covered with black smudges or has broken glass, it's hard to find any place that falls under modern by American standards (the fact that every building is constructed out of Ye Olde Jerusalem Stone doesn't help its image). This is odd to me because Israel really isn't that third-world of a country -- it has some of the most advanced tech sectors in the world and has a pretty sharp population.

Anyhoo, yesterday (Wednesday) was great because I got to spend the whole day with my cousins. I love my grandma, really, but I can only go visit so many old people and listen to tales of how bad things are now so many times before I grow gray hairs of my own. So I spent all day with people my age or younger and in the evening we actually went out for drinks and sushi -- it is a very surreal experience to read a Japanese menu in Hebrew.

Tonight's the big night for my cousin Ravit and her soon-to-be hubby Raz. They really make a great couple (not to mention their wedding is going to be held in one of the most lavish hotels in the country), Valentine's Eve is going to be a lot of fun for everyone . More to come on that later.

And now, your moment of zen:

Year of the Rat!

2008-02-07T20:34:20Z

Happy Chinese New Year!

Being the first sign of the Chinese zodiacs, rats are leaders, pioneers and conquerors. They are charming, passionate, charismatic, practical and hardworking. Rat people are endowed with great leadership skills and are the most highly organized, meticulous, and systematic of the twelve signs. Intelligent and cunning at the same time, rats are highly ambitious and strong-willed people who are keen and unapologetic promoters of their own agendas, which often include money and power. They are energetic and versatile and can usually find their way around obstacles, and adapt to various environments easily. A rat's natural charm and sharp demeanor make it an appealing friend for almost anyone, but rats are usually highly exclusive and selective when choosing friends and so often have only a few very close friends whom they trust.

Behind the smiles and charm, rats can be terribly obstinate and controlling, insisting on having things their way no matter what the cost. These people tend to have immense control of their emotions, which they may use as a tool to manipulate and exploit others, both emotionally and mentally. Rats are masters of mind games and can be very dangerous, calculative and downright cruel if the need arises. Quick-tempered and aggressive, they will not think twice about exacting revenge on those that hurt them in any way. Rats need to learn to relax sometimes, as they can be quite obsessed with detail, intolerant and strict, demanding order, obedience, and perfection.

Rats consider others before themselves, at least sometimes, and avoid forcing their ideas onto others. Rats are fair in their dealings and expect the same from others in return, and can be deeply affronted if they feel they have been deceived or that their trust has been abused. Sometimes they set their targets too high, whether in relation to their friends or in their career. But as the years pass, they will become more idealistic and tolerant. If they can develop their sense of self and realize it leaves room for others in their life as well, Rats can find true happiness.

According to tradition, Rats often carry heavy karma and at some point in life may face an identity crisis or some kind of feeling of guilt. Rats are said to often have to work very long and hard for everything they may earn or have in life. However, a Rat born during the day is said to have things a bit easier than those who are born at night. Traditionally, Rats born during the night may face extreme hardships and suffering throughout life. Rats in general should guard themselves against hedonism, as it may lead to self-destruction. Gambling, alcohol and drugs tend to be great temptations to Rat natives.

Traditionally, Rats should avoid Horses, but they can usually find their best friends and love interests in Monkeys, Dragons, and Oxen.

Professions include espionage, psychiatry, psychology, writing, politics, law, engineering, accounting, detective work, acting, and pathology.

Guys can be morons

2008-02-07T10:47:14Z

Yes, yes, I could probably lead into a joke with this, but seriously, why are so many guys I know so totally lowbrow? I have a few really attractive gal friends I hang out with here, and that's really all there is to it, but whenever I tell guys about them or show them a picture, nearly every one of them has so far made a particularly lewd comment and then asked if I've been sleeping with them (and when I say no they then follow up with "when will you?"), and then the conversation shifts into some lockerroom incarnation of the Twilight Zone until I can force it back to normality. It's like out of all my male friends only two of them have enough class not to be blatantly stupid. Hey I'm human, I can appreciate a woman's body as much as the next person, but have some dignity guys: not everyone needs to hear your opinions on what you think of women as channeled via Al Bundy.

Off to the Middle East

2008-02-06T09:29:31Z

Whenever I tell people I'm going to Israel, the reactions tend to either be "Wow, how exciting!" or "Is that safe?". I've always thought these were funny things to hear, probably because I've already been there more than 18 times -- to me, it's passe'.
Not that I don't love the place, Israel is like a second home. Spent most of my summers there as a kid visiting my grandparents -- the kibbutz they live in is its own community, tons of places to wander to, beautiful countryside (did you know the climate is exactly like southern California? It only turns into desert when you go further south near Egypt). The cities themselves are amazing and have so much history to them all -- it's wild to walk through Jerusalem or Akko or drive through Nazereth and know people still live normal lives in buildings thousands of years old. Plus access to a pool and a T3 internet connection (how my grandmother got her hands on that I have no idea) and plenty of European tourists keeps things interesting. Been trying to drag my friends there for years, it's a great experience, but no one ever seems to have time to take an international trip :P.

So come this Saturday I'm hopping a plane to Haifa for my cousin's wedding. Should be fun, I haven't been there in four years. Will also be chauffering mom and grandmother around to Tel Aviv and Jerusalem (driving in Israel is always... interesting). Been getting things ready: clothes, paying bills, writing my will (well it is the Middle East; plus anyone who's seen an episode of Lost knows trans-oceanic flights aren't without risk), and setting the VCR for a week (speaking of Lost), among other things. Good times ahead.

Feel the power, baby!

2008-02-04T11:09:44Z

Power. Just how much do we as individuals have? Just how much are we after?

I'm reading two book series right now. One (which I just finished the first book of) is called Ender's Game and other is called Death Note. Both are, at the moment, about power and influence. Both are about young people with the ability to change the world and about amassing the power to do so, in one way or another.

For those not in the know, here's a brief synopsis of each:

Death Note is about a high schooler named Light Yagami who comes across a blank booklet called a death note. He finds that anyone whose name he writes in it dies in almost any way he sees fit. Instead of using the book to eliminate one or two people, Light takes it upon himself to rid the world of all criminals and evil doers and create a utopian society with himself as the one true god. And Light is a brilliant, charismatic young man (despite arguably being a sociopath) – he pits his cunning and ambition against a variety of law enforcement agencies and truly becomes a force to be reckoned with without anyone even knowing his true identity.

Ender's Game is the story of a young boy named Ender Wiggin as he rises through the ranks of a futuristic military through what should have been a normal childhood. Ender is brilliant and resourceful and is raised by the military hierarchy to be the best commander the world has ever known. He wants no power yet it is constantly placed upon him, and he struggles to hold onto his humanity even when the world around him seems determined to strip him of it. While the descriptive nature of tactics and immersing you in this harsh, unforgiving lifestyle are a vibrant part of this story, what really matters in the end is Ender himself, this little boy and what he must go through and sacrifice to do protect what he loves.

In Ender's Game I had reached a point where one of the boys in the story – Peter, who is no older than twelve – has declared that he will control the world, through words and manipulation and influence. I read this and I stopped and I thought. What was I doing at age twelve? I was playing with Transformers, I was watching cartoons, reading comics, stealing glances of my teacher's chest (and probably not being as subtle as I believed myself to be)… I certainly didn't give a whiff about the politics of the world or of control. But over the course of history there have been those that did, people that grew up faster and could see the world past its surface distractions.

One of the quotes in Ender's Game stuck with me: "Power will always end up with the sort of people who crave it". I don't think that's solely true – everyone craves power of one sort or another: power over others, over themselves and their own lives… What makes the difference is what you're willing to do to achieve it. There are those who sit around waiting to win a lotto ticket, craving the power money will give them over their own lives (though for the most part they just end up with a fat ass and consider that one time they were seen on the news as their moment in the spotlight). But anyone with a working brain cell knows you aren't going to achieve actual power by hanging around and hoping it comes your way. It has to be pursued. Worked for.

And of course there's the simple capacity to grasp power as well – you don't rule the world without knowing how to work the crowd. Despite every after-school special and lame family sitcom we've ever seen, looks do make a difference, and when you combine that with intellect and drive you have a lot of influence.

I think one of the biggest factors in being able to achieve real control of the world, and one of the factors why Ender himself never wanted extensive power over others, is the capacity to embrace "the big picture". It's the ability not only to see that not everyone's going to be happy with your decisions, but to do whatever it takes to achieve your goals in spite of it. People will inevitably stand in your way. And more often than not, it comes down to the question: you or me?

How much does that power mean to you? And how far are you willing to go to grasp it? Who is willing to go the extra mile to be on top and call the shots? That's all part of the capacity to take power and lead, as well as to hold onto it.

Light Yagami is someone who is perfectly designed for achieving power. He's got looks, charm and intelligence, as well as a knack for understanding how others think which gives him a great advantage at anticipating opposition. He's also ruthless: he easily eliminates anyone who gets in his way and has no qualms about crossing a line. To him, taking an innocent life comes down to a simple question: is their death necessary for the greater good? If so, then he writes them off (literally).

Peter is the same way: nothing is more important to him than achieving power, so from that point on life and death are only parts of the equation when it comes to influencing others and increasing his power-base.

Ender, someone with practically unlimited ability to control, is probably one of the most powerless individuals in his own story. He is manipulated at every turn by those around him, tricked or coerced into every single role he plays because his capacity as a tool is what's needed. The only power he wants is over his own life, and it's that very power which he never seems to grasp.

So what makes Ender different from Light or Peter? Empathy. The capacity to feel what others feel, his greatest strength and his greatest weakness. True, Light and Peter are both intelligent enough to see how others will react and feel but they don't allow themselves to be touched by those feelings; people are not people in their eyes, family and friends are really neither, everyone's just a pawn on the board. Ender, however, does: it's what blocks him from ever having real power (and is really the only thing enslaving him throughout the book), but it's also what allows him to keep his humanity. And his connection to the human race is far more important to Ender than any kind of control he might otherwise have. He knows the big picture is there, but he refuses to be a part of it.

I do wonder about that sometimes, though: there are a lot of problems in the world that someone could easily solve by just snuffing out a life. Would I do it if I felt it was justified? Would I write Osama bin Laden's name, or Kim Jong Il? Would I stop there, would I try to wipe out every killer waiting 20 years for the electric chair or every rapist who walked from a jail sentence on a technicality? One of Light's advantages is that he can kill without any repercussions: it's practically impossible to link him to any of the murders he commits thanks to the death note. And justifying taking life in the name of the greater good has been the hallmark of virtually every world leader in history. So I do toy with the idea sometimes, what would I do if given access to the kind of tool Light has? Would the only thing stopping me be fear of punishment? I personally believe one of the only things keeping humanity as a whole in check from utter barbarism is fear of prison or fear of Heaven and Hell, that someone out there is keeping tabs. Who knows? When you die you might just find your ass poked with a pitchfork.

Or instead of fear of punishment, if I knew I would be caught and punished would I still use the death note, or direct a weapon like Ender Wiggin, believing my cause to be just, that my acts are still part of the greater good? If I had such power, would I use it?

Honestly, I don't desire control over others, something Peter and Light want. Too much responsibility, plus I tend to look too far into the big picture: why build a utopian empire if two or three generations later the whole lesson would be lost or perverted by those still alive and craving their own power? (for a faith preaching love and tolerance, Christians have killed more people than any other religion in history, something I'm pretty sure Jesus would have frowned upon) But for the power to protect those I love and keep away the fear of evil in their lives? Would I take a life? Or two? Would I change the world itself so that no evil could come at them from any angle?

Who knows? I guess I'd just have to cross that line when I come to it.

No. Frakkin'. Way.

2008-02-01T08:56:19Z

And for those of us not familiar with the more colorful dialogue of outer space --> link

Life's a beach

2008-01-22T22:55:03Z

There are a few places in this world where I feel totally at peace. One is (as cliche as it sounds) on the open road, whenever I happen to be driving cross-country to visit friends or randomly travel -- I always like to take side roads instead of freeways, you end up so far away from anything that the world around you feels pristine and untouched, and the stars in the sky are always so bright and numerous. Another is my grandmother's place in Israel -- I spent my summers there when I was a kid and I could go anywhere around town and not worry about anything, it was total freedom. The most perfect place for me, however, is Coronado Island in San Diego.

So around midnight I hopped in my car and drove out to Coronado -- how cool is it to be able to walk the beach at 12am in the dead of winter and not be freezing? The moon was full and the whole beach was illuminated like day, I was casting a perfect shadow and could see every detail of the world around me . It had been raining earlier so no one was out, I had the whole beach to myself. It feels amazing the walk out there in this mixture of light and darkness -- nothing but flat sandy beach around you and the endless surf to your west, you feel like you're on top of the world and you're surrounded by this amazing, overwhelming sky. In the distance north you can see some lights from the naval base, to the east you have a slight pinkish glow from downtown San Diego and can even see some of the taller buildings poking over the horizon, to the south you have the beautiful Hotel del Coronado and even further beyond are hillsides covered in Tijuana's lights.

The only life I saw were occassional flocks of little birds scuttling about in groups, stopping to peck the sand in the hunt for food, but that was it -- I owned the beach. It was and always is an overwhelmingly spiritual experience :).